I took my friend’s advice and contacted two of the men from who I had gone out with and hadn’t heard from again. I figured that if I hadn’t heard from them in several days to a week, I would have nothing to lose if I got in touch. And, I would know it wasn’t about them thinking that I wasn’t interested. At least there would be some closure and no more wondering. 

I contacted my date from Tuesday night and so far, I have heard absolutely nothing in reply. It’s so weird to spend time with someone, have them suggest that you do it again, and then poof! they are gone forever. I hate that about internet dating.

The guy from the hike is out of town so I figure he’ll either contact me when he gets back . . . or not. I wasn’t going to try to reach him knowing he couldn’t be reached.

I decided it didn’t really matter what this guy thought as I would’ve had to proceed with caution anyway so it might be best that he’s disappeared. He did send me a note the night of our date but that was the end of that. .

And finally, I sent a text to the guy from coffee a couple weeks ago. He was starting a new position so I wished him luck. He has contacted me since our date, but not to ask me out and not to flirt and it had been a couple weeks since I last heard from him. I wasn’t sure if he was fishing or what. I thought this one would yield a date, but all that happened was that he asked me to come over and have sex with him. OK, not those exact words, but close enough.

When it came up you could probably see the steam come out of my ears I was so pissed/annoyed/frustrated/disappointed. I thought of some pretty nasty things to text back, but I controlled myself and decided to be cool. Clearly he was not interested in me and thought he had nothing to lose by asking me to come over and fuck him in a roundabout way. Can’t blame a guy for trying, right? Well, not really, as I am clearly on a dating site and my profile is all about looking for a relationship and not a FWB situation — as is his. Anyway, I flirted back in my witty, non-sexual way and this went on for a few minutes before I told him, again in a witty way, that it wasn’t happening. He texted some smiles and I ignored him. I had nothing more to say.

The only good thing that came from this is that I know my date from Tuesday is not interested (not surprised, but now I don’t have to question it) and the coffee guy is also not interested but is kind-of a douche and wouldn’t mind fucking me. Good to know.


5 thoughts on “See?

  1. Have you thought about the whole kid thing? Do you want children of your own, are you down with getting involved with a man with kids, like Mr. Tuesday? If you haven’t already thought about how you feel about kids it would be good to figure out what you want. I talked to a second wife once who was irked by having to deal with her husband’s daughter from his first marriage. I had no sympathy for her because of course her husband is going to want his daughter to stay with him on her summer break, etc. The ongoing financial support required is another major issue to consider, too.

    • Yes, I have thought about kids. I’m not sure I want any of my own. It depends on the father. And, as far as potential stepkids I tend to be cautious. I have been down that road before and although it was not terrible, there are lots of things I know to look for now and I learned lots and lots of lessons.

  2. I am little confused why the title of your post is “See?”.
    Are we suppose to “see” how initiating contract with a man after a date is pointless?
    Or are we readers suppose to “see” just how crappy the selection is of single men?
    Or do you want us to “see” how unloveable you are, how you are not going to find someone, how you should just give up?
    Married women will tell you how they pursued their husbands, advice columns will remind you that even though there are lots of creeps- you just need one good guy, and friends& family will tell you you’re great, you will find someone…..

    But the truth is dating sucks, and it is sucking particularily hard for you right now.

    And the catch is the more things don’t work out, the harder it is to stay unbitter and unjaded. Bitter& Jaded- sounds like a gourment salad blend, but really some very unattractive qualities.

    Just remember this- sometimes when we feel we cant take it anymore, that we cant go on, something happens that changes everything.
    Even if that something is just the enthusiam to just keep going.

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