Third date – no sex

Runner and I met for dinner last night at a lovely Peruvian restaurant. I had a feeling that this was going to be the date where he offers to cook for me at his place (aka, get in my pants) and I wasn’t ready for that. While I did shave my legs before the date and I wore matching underwear, I also told him I had to be downtown for work that evening (lie) so that hopefully I would guide him into just meeting there. During dinner he told me that he was going to ask me to come to his place for dinner but didn’t think I was ready for that yet, and since I was going to be downtown anyway . . . Can you tell I’ve been dating for a long time or what? I skirted the issue and the conversation.

We were a little more playful than normal over dinner even though I was really tired and he seemed to be as well. After dinner he walked me to my car and we spent a lot of time kissing and flirting. He’s a good kisser. We were totally exposed on a busy street-corner but I was really lost in the moment. 

He travels quite a bit over the next few weeks and asked to see me again before he leaves this weekend. I’m going to say yes and I have a feeling sex is going to be involved this time.

The honeymoon is over with Cutie, it seems. Either that or I’m going through a phase. He’s been busy with work as it’s high-season for his industry. He makes an effort, I know that. But, there’s just something about being wanted for blowjobs and pussy versus liking me as a human being and having an interest in me besides fucking. I won’t hear from him for a day or two and then I’ll get a text about him being horny and wanting my lips around his cock. I don’t want a relationship, but a nice, “Hey, how are you? How was your weekend?” before diving into the sex talk would be a bigger turn-on for me. 

I don’t know why it bugs me so much. Is it because it’s too easy? Is it because I don’t want to feel used? Is it because I’m a woman? Or am I being emotional? Either way, I just haven’t been answering Cutie’s texts because I don’t know what to say to him right now and it’s easier to avoid it all together. I think he’s been clued in on the fact that I have feelings for him, but that’s just a hunch I have. We seem to both talk in circles at times when we’re together.


4 thoughts on “Third date – no sex

  1. I totally get where you are coming from and how you feel. Keep in mind that once you
    have sex, the dynamic changes and you no longer have the power of being a conquest.
    Sex on the third that is expected. The longer you hold out, the more you distinguish your-
    self from the rest.

    Just like the Down town story, make something up, like you’re not ready just yet, but are
    really into him, which will keep him on his toes and on his best behavior. If he stops per-
    suing you, it means that he only wanted sex and your better off.

    His reaction will, show you, if he is into you, or just waiting it out to get to the sex part.

    Be clear about what you want and expect from him, or else it might backfire once you
    do have sex with him.

    Good luck!

    • I don’t know him well enough to decide how much I like him. And I don’t play games or hold out. I have sex when I’m ready. And, finally, I’m not sure what I want or expect from him. I feel like I’m just taking things day by day at this point.

  2. Seems to me like you’re interested in Runner enough to reconsider Cutie’s f-buddy games. When there’s nothing else around, there might be some allure to what Cutie has to offer. However, I don’t know about you, but I’d drop that kind of thing in a heartbeat if I met someone I had a lot more interest in.

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